This is Your Chance to Obey Me

    I find myself in battle-like situations with my four-year old son Silas quite often here lately. He's really smart. He's really articulate. He's really only 4 years old and that is where the combination of all those things become lethal. He's not like an evil child or anything, but from time to time, like all  4-year old children, he becomes a little demanding. Ok, a lot demanding. He's still testing the boundaries of where his autonomy ends and where my authority begins. I find myself using a phrase with him over and over lately during those times when the look of great determination glazes his eyes over and I can sense his selective hearing kicking in. The phrase is: "This is your chance to obey me."I say it several times a day. I pull the phrase out when he's at the breaking point and I can see he's ready to plunge into a battle of wills with me over something like whether or not to put those toys away like I asked, or whether to continue talking in a disrespectful tone. Sometimes he makes the right choice and obeys, and sometimes...well, sometimes he doesn't. I always breathe a sigh of relief when he just goes along with what I said because that means that happy times will ensue. But when he wants what he wants and isn't going to budge, well that's when things get fairly unhappy.
 
    It's in these moments that I find myself wondering if this is how God feels about us, His children. I think about my own day and how many times did I have a "chance to obey" God but chose instead to do my own thing.  And just like with my little darling boy, things get very unhappy in a hurry. Obedience is hard for a pre-schooler for sure. But I'm thinking that even though as adults we have (hopefully) dropped the temper tantrums and fits, stopped the angry outbursts (again...hopefully) and the throwing of objects or hitting the closest passerby (definitely hopefully), we still have the moments my son has. We know what we want. All we can think about is that "thing", that "feeling", that "person". We don't want anything to stand in our way, we just want our way. But God steps in and whispers in our ears "This is your chance to obey me."Then we have a choice to make-plunge headlong into a destructive course of action authored by our selfish impulsive desires, or throw our hands up and say, "Ok God. I'm going to obey. I'm going to wait. I'm going to believe that you know more than I do."

    I think it all comes down to trust and faith. I came across this quote by Dietrich Bonhoeffer, who, long story short, is known historically as a German pastor who was martyred as a result of his resistance against Nazism  as a founding member of the Confessing Church. His story is fascinating and if I had all day, I would chronicle his life here, but alas, you already know what kind of childhood forces I'm up against today as I am hurriedly typing this, so I'll keep it short and sweet. Bonhoeffer once said, "Only he who believes is obedient; only he who is obedient believes." I mean, think about that for a minute because it's huge. Absolutely huge. So huge that I can't even wrap my head around it in adult world, so I'll slip back to Mom-raising-a-strong-willed-4-year-old World. Does my son really believe in me when I give him a directive. Does he see me and my love for him more than seeing me as a barrier to his fun times? When I tell my son that I want him to do something, or change a behavior, I don't want him to do it simply because he's afraid of me or because he wants to avoid punishment (although those can certainly be motivating factors for children and adults alike). I want him to obey me, because I want him to believe in his heart that I want the best for him. I want him to have faith in his Mother that she knows more than he does and can see from past experiences of her own that what I say and what I expect will be beneficial to him in the long run. It's tough for a 4-year old kid to see beyond right now and see that the future is dependent on the now. That's where we as parents step in. And I believe that's where God steps in too. How many times have you been in a tough situation where your way seems best, but it goes against what you know God would want. It's tough to look beyond the desires of now and the possible consequences that await us. But I want to obey. Because to obey sends the message to God, "Father, I believe in You and You alone."

     I think I've probably given myself a lot to chew on and I hope that you can chew with me, so I'll leave you with a quote by Chuck Colson that I also love and that also has huge implications for us and our quest for obedience: "Maturing faith, faith that deepens and grows as we live our Christian life is not just knowledge, but knowledge acted upon. It is not just belief, but belief lived out and practiced." The word "maturing" pops out at me in that statement. My son, even though he has some very willful days now and then is getting better with time. I can now begin to reason with him. I'm finding that as we develop a close relationship built on trust and the simple enjoyment of being together, that those times where he wants to do his own thing are being replaced more and more with the change of attitude and the belief that Mom really DOES know what she's talking about. Cause and effect is kicking in for him. In our Christian walk, I think it's the same way. As we develop that trust in God and begin to realize that He truly does "work all things to our good", we mature. And those times where we want to throw an inner temper tantrum against Him give way to beauty of surrender and belief that He who made us, He who we can call "Father", He who knows what we need before we even know it ourselves, He who has lined up every star and planet in the sky, can surely look down our roads and lead us on a course of obedience, knowing His good and perfect plans for our lives.

     Wishing you a blessed 2011 filled with obedience, trust, faith, searching, and knowing that He is good.

Carrie